My Run Day

I had signed up for 4 competitive and organized runs this year, and one of them was today, The 8km run was in a park with lots of paths and hills and scenic views, it was my second year on that trail so i kind of knew the routes a bit, and was pacing my self knowing where the hill and the descend points were.

driving to the event, i was preparing my self for the run in my head and going through thing like breathing and postures for ascending and descending hills to be easier on my knees, and for some reason imagined seeing him (ex) at the end of the race or some where in middle, out of no where i was chasing a tear down my face.

i go t so emotional over that thought of love intrigue or fantasy that it got me, with my sobriety i though i would get a better hand of my fantasy and intrigues, but it seems the farther i am getting in my sobriety i am getting more involved with my thoughts.

i finished the 8km run respectively under 45 minutes, it was refreshing to start the year in a organized run, and hopefully will continue till the half marathon in the fall with my sobriety.

My therapist has advised me to write about my emotions and it will clear things up, but the more i write the more involved i get with my emotions over the ex, and cant seam to run from the constant thought and memories that come up. as its apparent i haven't had a good way of dealing with it so far and don't have a concrete method of dealing with it, i am taking it one at a time and i try not to let it get me to lose my 3 months sobriety as a main goal for now.

"Keep coming Back"