As previously blogged I have a, unexplainable sexual desires around the full moon and even though I wasn’t counting the days down but I knew something was different that day and when I checked the calendar, sure it was "full moon" written all over the 27th.
yesterday I managed to stay away as much as I could from the internet by being on my feet and moving around at work and running to do office supply run, while its not part of my duty.
Today I have started taking the anxiety depressant pill but I quarter the pill and take the quarter and the effect is much lower to the full pill with full crashes and suppressing effects, I have managed to stay surf free and less interactions of sexual internet based interaction.
Its full 5 months that I have stayed sober with my main bottom line of not action out sexually, but to be with reality I have come very close in breaking it and going through with having sex with people or the fact that I broke my internet barrier has been very devastating and at the same time harder to keep my sexual sobriety in check during the course of internet, porn and other sexual patterns can be only one click away.
I masturbate as much as I can at home and at my own presence so I won’t act out with other or remotely be interested in a sexual partner both past or to new sexual liaison.
Also I want to check in with my blog that I got a text from the guy I dated after the Ex last year, and it was neutral and was about him praying for my recovery and wishes that I am still healthy, but I haven’t replied back to him and have stayed away from the past and continue to close my past chapters.
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