Feeling Homeless

Homeless

I yelled and shouted
But only in my head

I clawed and crawled
But only in my thoughts

I loved and kissed
Only in my fantasy

I moved in with you
But only in my words

Actions fell short of any
When push came to shove

I was an addict in recovery
That though it saw the end of addiction

End of tunnel! But wasn’t that light,
Course of relapse has its name

I am homeless in my heart
Relapse no more; won’t you give me an arm?



It’s been 5 weeks, and today I went and joined another SLAA group downtown.
It was different and I though perhaps I could connect with people who are in the same boat and situation, but it was cold on the first session, not too many attended. I talked about my ordeal and what has helped me so far as some people had real ordeals with theirs and someone was specifically asking for help. This person was afraid of being alone, and I could since it in their tone of voice and understand them.

you can’t talk back in SLAA there for I reached out in the consultation session by instating what has helped me so far, by going through the class having this Blog to write down my thoughts and be honest with yourself. Also did mention about creating bottom lines and sticking to them perhaps having a therapist helps as well.

Today I found myself alone and wanted to act out, and I was downtown I would be easier but I quickly left the class and drove home and watched a movies and Grammies
And I am still active in my own spiritual community and have taken up more role as before I had given up fearing that it might be too much for me.

5 weeks now that I am sex free and I have not contacted any one for sex I have masturbated and abstained from physical contact with others.

"Keep coming back"