After my last post I thought about how depressed I have been and at the same time with no communication from any one I have been in some ways leveling off with myself that I am no longer continuing to hurt any ones feeling.
the 6 months of no dating and no sex seems to be off to a good start, but there are times that I think about "what if's" of the past and what I should have done in my situation and have divulged in my moment, the best way I can get that though out of my head is to think of work, family or thought that that moment never existed and what I am thinking is not what actually occurred it was just me romanticizing the moment larger than it occurred or self mutilating myself beyond capacity.
for now I am okay, there are thoughts of acting out and meeting someone, with masturbation and self indulgence eg, good meal, shower, or gift to myself and splurging I have kept a clean record for two weeks now.
Don’t forget that it is one day at a time effort and by taking it one day at a time it doesn’t look so cumbersome, as the big image of 6 months can be.
So find your commitment and stick to it, discuss it with your partner and lover about your weakness and or addictions, it helps when there is a support behind you.
"Keep coming back"
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